Hello? Everyone doing ok? Kids found their way back? Sure there were tears and yelling and probably threatening to take away ALL electronics for the rest of forever, but BESIDES that?
Everyone surviving back to school??
I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with the start of a new school year. On the one hand, it feels nice to get back to some sort of schedule, and we all know how much I love office supplies, but…
I have a hard time facing the reality of summer being over.
For most of my adult (parental) life, I’ve had to work all summer – with summer being busy season and super stressful. Surviving the stress of deadlines to jump right in to school and paperwork and all the things that go with it? WORST. Plus? I really love hanging out with my kids and I never feel like I get to do that enough.
I’m really selling this back to school business.
But here’s the deal: over the years, I’ve tried tackling the aspects of back to school that I hate as best I can. (And apparently I hate many aspects of back to school. Geez.) Here’s what I’ve learned-ish.
I hate homework. I hate fighting with whatever small human needs to complete the stack of worksheets or the science project or term paper. I hate it all.
Confession: I don’t hate it quite so much now that I’m home with my kid when she gets home from school. I feel like an asshat saying that but when you have more time to get things done, you have more time for patience.)
We’ve never had a space designated JUST for homework because I’ve always had to help my kids as I’m doing something else. Like making dinner. Or signing the ONE MILLION forms the school sends home every year. I wish I could show you some Pinterest worthy homework table but that’s not a reality in my world. The kitchen table? THAT is where the homework magic happens. It’s also where the homework crying and yelling happens, but hey…it’s getting done, right??
The truth of the matter is that I also hate making lunches. I’m a terrible mother is what we’re learning. Can’t you feed yourself? Can’t you hunt and gather during your lunch period? Some plants and leaves? Hunger Games your way through the 9th grade? No? FINE HERE IS YOU SANDWICH THAT IS GOING TO GET SQUISHED IN YOUR BACKPACK OF ONE MILLION BOOKS AND CRAP.
(Note: I don’t love making lunches even now that I’m home more. BALANCE.)
I have no idea why small humans have such an aversion to showering. There is no trick to this. Just pray. And drink. And pray. That is my advice. Also, in my experience: IT GETS BETTER. But, if you have girls, the pendulum swings FAAAAAAR the other way and then all of a sudden they are taking YEARS! to get ready. So instead of weeping because you have to negotiate with a 5 year old to just wash their dang hair, you learn to set the alarm when it’s time to leave – even though they’re not downstairs yet – because that’s the only thing that seems to make them hurry. I guess it’s the teenager version of counting to three.
MOM’S RULES BECAUSE SHE RULES
It feels cruel that school starts so early these days. I always feel short changed and I refuse to let “back to school” get in the way of the rest of my summer. It feels like I’ve spent a million hours helping this household get ready for back to school and school meetings so I’ve taken to wearing this t-shirt in hopes that people stop asking me to do things. It ALMOST works. At the very least, it makes a statement.
And, because we love you, we’ve been trying to make you laugh as often as we can. A podcast for your commute and/or the drive to pick up the little angels from school or sports.
We even have Cozy Couch Chats in small doses. JUST FOR YOU. Because we know you’re super pressed for time (because homework):
Yeah…I miss summer. Already. And since I haven’t had much of one, I’m going to grab EVERY. DAMN. MOMENT. I. CAN. And I want this for you. All of you.
Even if that calls for day drinking. Or drinking while you fight with the small humans to take a damn shower because they stink.
We can help you with that too. We’re here for you.